Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
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