i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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