Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize
