Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize
