Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
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