fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
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Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
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