their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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