I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more