Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
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