you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
