That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Randomize
