no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
should my penis look like a turkey
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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