How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Mom said you looked used
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Randomize
