btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize