I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Randomize