So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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