at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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