you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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