im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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