Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I need a hoe opinion
go on
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
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