I puked a lego.
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...