I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
We left an ass print on the piano.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
