how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
