party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
