I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize
