Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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