I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
