Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
