there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize
