im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
