the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
