we're chasing vodka with high fives
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
