WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
