WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Randomize
