So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
is wine microwaveable?
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
i need some magic done to my vagina
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