grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
