and you said cock pushups were impossible
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
