then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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