you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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