HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
