Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
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mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
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Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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