i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
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