took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Randomize
