The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Randomize
