so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Randomize