I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
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