there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Randomize
