I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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