I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
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