You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
grandma shit on top of the toilet
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Randomize
