she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
only if we run a train.
done.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Randomize
