i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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