Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
My pussy is not your playground.
only you would photoshop your dick
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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